How Sweet It Is

It is exactly three weeks ago today that the poodles, Pooker, and I moved to the new house. And today, exactly three weeks later, the other feathers and furs joined us. They moved in like they have been waiting to arrive, waiting to demonstrate their new routines. And they got right to it.

At some point I'll be able to articulate what I am feeling in this moment. For now, I'll use words like relief, contentment, satisfaction, pride, exhaustion, hopeful, encouraged, grateful, humbled, determined, protective, accomplished.

Today, it's mostly about the word gratitude. Heaps and buckets, rivers and pools, an endless supply.

Moving the ranch is not easy. Moving while renovating is not easy. Moving while leaving half your family behind is definitely not easy. Without my friends, well, let's just say I was fortunate enough to not know what that would mean.

I thank you, my friends and family, for your support, your time, your encouragement, your talent, your car, your trailer, your truck, your generosity, your caring, your strength, your humor, your effort, your thoughtfulness, your food, YOU.

I love you all. You all have your own spot in my heart. And while my animals are not sure who some of you are yet, I know they too send you love because they know who and what is important to me, that is for sure.

So, as I sit here worn out from the day's physical activity and emotional experience, I am freshly showered and comfortable on my sofa. The night air is cooling. I can hear the night bugs, I can hear my pups breathing in deep sleep. And I can hear my boys outside my window moving around, Shadow calling up to me on occasion, and I can reassure him quite easily no matter where I am in the house.

This is how sweet it is.

Unraveling

It's a word that has come up quite a bit lately.

First, it was used multiple times while doing exactly that with a little more than acres of electric fence tape. Five individual strands were wound together, criss-crossing around a long pressure treated post to make it easier to store and transport. No one thought about the unwind.

Then it was an emotional meltdown last Sunday. I'm not sure I used the word unravel, but it sure was a great description of my state of mind.

Yesterday, it came up again. This time, it was attempting to start a new roll of toilet tissue. There were pieces flying all over the place, big, little, long strips, tiny specs, and I was digging down two layers before I could get that bugger started.

So, what is it about that word? Is it my life unraveling before my eyes? Is it unraveling the binds of the past few years, strung so tightly while desperately holding us all together, waiting for our own space to appear? Is there a mystery somewhere deep down inside that with some crafty soul unraveling, I'll become much wiser?

Or is it as my friend, Mark, said to me while I was grunting and snorting and rejecting any pause in progress of unraveling that danged electric tape: "With a little bit of patience, we can get this done."

Well, such a simple statement for such a huge undertaking. But what about that? What about recognizing that as this new chapter page turns, awaiting the words to be written, patience will lay it out nicely, line by line, at the pace of a relaxed Sunday reader. It's my story. I'm the author. With what word will I choose to begin?

We got that post unraveled. And now with that tape I am creating a new space for my family.

Patience. Who knew!

Unraveling

It's a word that has come up quite a bit lately.

First, it was used multiple times while doing exactly that with a little more than acres of electric fence tape. Five individual strands were wound together, criss-crossing around a long pressure treated post to make it easier to store and transport. No one thought about the unwind.

Then it was an emotional meltdown last Sunday. I'm not sure I used the word unravel, but it sure was a great description of my state of mind.

Yesterday, it came up again. This time, it was attempting to start a new roll of toilet tissue. There were pieces flying all over the place, big, little, long strips, tiny specs, and I was digging down two layers before I could get that bugger started.

So, what is it about that word? Is it my life unraveling before my eyes? Is it unraveling the binds of the past few years, strung so tightly while desperately holding us all together, waiting for our own space to appear? Is there a mystery somewhere deep down inside that with some crafty soul unraveling, I'll become much wiser?

Or is it as my friend, Mark, said to me while I was grunting and snorting and rejecting any pause in progress of unraveling that danged electric tape: "With a little bit of patience, we can get this done."

Well, such a simple statement for such a huge undertaking. But what about that? What about recognizing that as this new chapter page turns, awaiting the words to be written, patience will lay it out nicely, line by line, at the pace of a relaxed Sunday reader. It's my story. I'm the author. How will I choose to start this?

We got that post unraveled. And now with that tape I am creating a new space for my family.

Patience. Who knew!

It's a New Year

As I'm sure you have noticed. A new calendar. A new line in the checkbook. A new annual deductible.

There is much that needs to shift. It is a time to reevaluate. The movement has been happening. The desire for different, growing.

When we have certain responsibilities, sometimes it is difficult to see how we can fit anything else in or change what must be done. I have been caught in this trap of thinking a little bit. I created the responsibilities. I created what must be done. As such, I can create the change. And what is it that I am seeking to change?

On this journey, sometimes that answer is crystal clear and that makes the mission easier. Then there are times when it is fuzzy, hazy, prickly, and that requires really going quiet to listen to the defined tones within the static. You know something isn't feeling right, you know it's time. But for what exactly? It's inquietude.

For the last few years I have been enjoying the unfolding of Facebook. I have been so grateful to reconnect with people from my past for whom I have always had a fondness. Our paths, while traveling in a different trajectory, still run parallel. Becoming friends with people I have never met in person has redefined the word friend to include kindred spirits. Facebook has been a fountain of useful information, expanding my knowledge base about familiar and unfamiliar topics. And the personal photos and videos--I think I enjoy them the most.

And now it seems, over the past year or so, that this social medium has become the lazy person's way to express their own dissatisfaction with life. It's a way to shift the responsibility for their state away from themselves. Stories are shared that are just not even true. There is no vetting that takes place. The story fits the fear that is festering so it warrants that Share button. Then there generally is no comment along with it. If there were, it would at least suggest some critical thought went into the sharing of information. No, just a share. In many cases, I don't believe the sharer even read the post themselves. I think the caption was enough to satisfy the need to feed the fearwolf (TM on that word, thank you.)

I find myself reading some of these posts and without knowing much about the history or the supposed author, my reasonable person's mind tells me something doesn't add up. So I do a very simple query, see that it's not accurate, I respond to the poster, and only in very few cases does the post get removed. For the rest, the post remains for others to share, perpetuating the negativity and untruth.

I have quite a few Facebook friends who never post anything fear-based, and I sure appreciate their choices. And then I just see so many posts with real low vibration that I ask, "What do you want to feel like every day? What makes you feel good?"

The unworthy: I bet only my real friends will send me a hug today.
The wannabe patriot: Share this if you support our veterans.
The God believer: Prove you love God and share this in the next 10 seconds.
The responsible US citizen: Let's build a wall to keep out all immigrants and refugees until we can take care of our homeless.
The only hard workers: Like if you think we should drug test all people on welfare.

What is it about these posts that make people feel good about themselves? These kinds of posts are very connected. They are divisive, they are judgmental, they are based in fear, and for me, they are too negative.

It has me questioning my own posts.  Do they fall into these categories that I find distasteful and uninteresting? I imagine we all like to think we are adding to the greater good when we hit Share or Like, but are we?

Admittedly, I am strong in my convictions. Would I like to see everyone move toward plant-based eating to end cruelty to all animals and improve our overall health? Yes, very much so. Would I like for everyone to choose a loving thought, action or intention over something spiteful, vindictive, or hurtful? Oh yes, I would. Would I like for everyone to wake up in the morning and see themselves as the most important priority in their life? I would because I believe all of their other relationships would flourish. Would I like everyone to honor their own god? Absolutely yes, because when we can truly honor our god, we can only honor others.

As difficult as it may be, I am going to refrain from posting much on Facebook for a bit while I explore my own intentions. It will be a challenge because I find Andy Borowitz incredibly funny. I may post some photos or comment on another post, but I will be keeping a vigilant eye on the tone. I want to live in the most positive light possible. Only I can make space for the positive light around me, only I am responsible for that.

Peace.

Fierce Protectors

This has come up before and again in the past couple of weeks, and that is how protective my animals are of me.  It isn't until someone else points it out that I am aware of it.  I don't think of them as protecting me, but only of how protecting them is my mission, part of my commitment to them.

When I stop and think of it though, we are a family and very bonded to one another, regardless of species.  Thinking about my own human biological family, we are fiercely protective of each other if someone else criticizes one of us or makes life difficult for one of us. It only stands to reason that my pack family would be the same.

Aside from the poodles, all of the animals are prey species, meaning, they are not predatory. But each of them has at one time or another come to my defense. I can recall very specific stories. And it isn't that I've been threatened all of those times, but it is what they have perceived. Sometimes, it has been one defending me from another, mainly Pippin.

I know that can be humorous but there have been a couple of instances where I have needed help because he turned on me without warning.  It has been a long time since I've needed to call on Shadow to help me. All I would do was call out, "Shadow!" with a very certain sound in my voice, and that angel of mine would come running from wherever he was. Pippin would back off immediately and proceed to be broadsided by all of Shadow's might if he didn't move quickly enough.  And then Shadow would stand tall beside me until I let him know I was safe. (And then I would proceed to comfort Pippin after being charged by his big brother.)

There are other stories like this that I can recall, when there was no denying one of them was looking after me. It makes me think how proud and fulfilled they must feel because when I care for them, when I command Shadow off of Pippin, or catch Alibi wanting to nip at Shadow's little behind, I know how strong I feel.

It is an honor to protect another. I think we all wear that badge of love with pride.

But Where Do You Get Your Protein?

This is very common question I am asked by people who really don't know where they get their own protein.  They've heard that protein is necessary to eat and that it is found in meat, chicken and fish, so that's what they eat.  My guess is, they're not really sure how many grams of protein their own body requires per day.  In fact, a study by Luna revealed that 50% of women between the ages of 18 and 50 do not know if they get enough protein in a day.

Where someone chooses to get their protein is their business.  And where I get mine is my business.

But, for the sake of sharing information, which might be helpful to everyone in this round of question and answer...

The recommended protein intake per day for the average sedentary woman is 46g. Note that most recommendations you'll see are for sedentary people; that's alarming. I bump my protein intake up to account for my activity level and aim to consume 70g of protein per day. I can achieve this rather easily without eating animal products.*

So, starting with a minimum of 46g per day, this is my tally so far, and I haven't had lunch yet:

protein bar 8g
almonds 21.1g
raisins 1g
apple 1g
egg* x 2 12g
lentils 9g
avocado 1.9g
tortilla 1g
lettuce .5g

I have already consumed 55.5g of protein.  I have surpassed the sedentary woman recommendation and am just 14.5g shy of the active woman recommendation.

In addition to the protein I gain from this food, you can see the other nutrients, vitamins and fiber included.  

If you believe your best source of protein comes from meat, are you aware of how little the recommended serving is compared to the average portion served?

I say, eat what makes you happy.  While doing that, I hope you are healthy.

I know I am both.

*I eat the eggs of my own happy, free-range, well-fed hens.  When they are not laying, I do not buy eggs from any other source.

What a Coincidence!

Said no one today.

I spent the full day at the first annual Wellness Faire hosted by my favorite local vegan restaurant, Salud Raw Food. Corrine put the idea out there and she drew in some 30+ wellness practitioners with everything from gong immersion to Reiki, to natural soap, massage and of course, Angel Card Readings.

My day started by helping my neighbors turn their canopy around.  As it turns out, my neighbors were Judy Petullo and her partner, Barb, of VegNet Bend.  Judy and I are friends on Facebook, like each other's posts, share interests, but have never met in person. Check.

At 11:11, we all gathered in a circle for an opening celebration which included a singing bowl, a beautiful spoken word of gratitude and a sweetly sung mantra, one of my favorites.  That felt right.

A woman came to my table before I had finished setting up just as I was realizing that the pretty sign I made was at home on my scanner. It was quite breezy so my candle wouldn't stay lit, neither would my sage.  She graciously offered to come back in ten minutes.

The day started out quiet, for which I was grateful, because I really needed to pull back and get grounded in why I was there.  And then the day started rolling.

One woman, a Queen of Swords, told me some things about just saying what needs to be said, saying what people may not want to hear, getting it done and how sometimes it sounds harsh, but she has incredible compassion for people. She is a Sagittarian and did I know what she means. Her reading had the Eight of Swords, referred to as the Victim Card.  I told her I didn't get the sense that it was referring to her but more to people around her.  She has ten people in her care, two are soon leaving, and just this morning she told them they have a choice to either play the victim or take control of their lives.  She also told me she took herself out last night with friends and they went to dinner and dancing at a place called Maverick's and asked if I had heard of it.

The young woman she brought with her, a very at risk gal, sat down for a reading.  She was new to Tarot but used some of her counselor's oracle cards. What powerful cards appeared for such a delicate question.  When I told her that as The Magician she has every tool she needs to bring about the change she wants to see, she beamed.  And then the Ace of Fire appeared followed by The Wheel of Fortune. In this deck, The Wheel is represented by Archangel Michael and when I asked her if she ever works with him, she pulled her medallion out from under her sweatshirt and she was radiant with hope.  She told me other people had told her it's up to her to make changes in her life, but "to hear it from you, you don't even know me" really hit home for her.

A very patient man waited for the people ahead of him and he told me he had to come over.  He wondered if he should but this morning he had seen a bluebird and when he looked over at me, there was a Western Scrub Jay hopping around beside me, and I was wearing blue.  He told me he keeps being drawn to the area near Smith Rock; he's looked at other areas, but keeps coming back.  I said, "because I live near Smith Rock?" He didn't believe me at first and then realized I was serious.  All four cards were of the suit of Water. He said, "well, you shuffled them!" and I said, "yes, but you cut them."

The readings went on and for those who know about the cards, it was one aha! moment after another.

My last reading was with another practitioner.  We were the last two in the parking lot and the sun finally was shining right over us, a little warmth to an otherwise cool day.  She mentioned living in another country, learning to speak another language and making a new life, living in several other places, being drawn to Oregon for some reason and finding Bend to be the place she couldn't find on the East coast, and as a Sagittarius, moving and starting again is exciting.  "Do you know what I mean?"

In my world, coincidence, as is typically defined, is to be expected.  Every one of those connections enriches the journey for each of us.